how are you today, love?
today is a kinder, gentler girl ninja. she is in a maternal cocoon cooing state of mind. she's floating around like pigeon feather in the breezy summer skies... coo coo... coo coo...
so i have anorexic eyebrows. ive been raping them since i was 13 and they now resemble two scraggy anemic lines.
lesson learnt kiddies- never rape your eyebrows. when i have kids- they will know 3 languages, how to play the guitar, how to snowboard and how NOT to have victimized eyebrows.
i mean, there are no options left.
you cant draw them in cz then you will end up looking like your aunt w/the angry blue eyebrows.
or worse yet- the cholas with the sharpie brows.. u know- like they took a sharpie and drew in two half elongated half moons above their eyes and called it a day, er week. (cz you know, sharpie lines last a long time)
at the moment, i trim them. im very anal about trimming the brows.
and i draw them in lightly w/ a brow pencil.
on any given day- my slight of hand sometimes manages to create beautiful works of symmetrical art. perfectly tapered, not too dark or light. just the right amount of arch. on other days, the skill is off.
my brows are the compass to my mood. good brows today? good ninja.
lopsided brows today? chokeabitch ninja.
i wish i had frida kahlo brows. then i would wax the uni and have perfectly shaped caterpillars.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
style board
here is a double post to make up for my negligence.
this joint is called girlninja style for a reason.
mishmash of outfits that inspire me. see a trend?
love the casual chic w/slight masculine touches.
ill leave the polyester bebe/guess/arbenb whatever outfits to the youngins
this joint is called girlninja style for a reason.
mishmash of outfits that inspire me. see a trend?
love the casual chic w/slight masculine touches.
ill leave the polyester bebe/guess/arbenb whatever outfits to the youngins
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
I fail at life
so much for my weekly update!
i apologize dear reader, girlninja has been one bad ninja.
and what excuses will i be pulling out from my bag of tricks? welllllll....
coakley lost the senate seat to brown. i mean hello- im a dem in bah-ston! my entire family including my 74 year old chinese father trekked out in the icy weather to vote for coakley. we dems are a proud bunch.
yeah... i believed that just about as much as you did.
i did just come back from a 3 day weekender snowboarding at sunday river where i had a fabulously lovely time. however i developed the following malaises:
1. slightly sprained right thumb
2. a fucked right big toe. i don't know exactly what's wrong with it but that shit is hurting and there were fleeting moments when i wondered if i would have to get that sucker amputated.
3. bruises
4. BED FUCKING BUGS. AGAIN! MOTHERFUCKERRRRR ME.
so yes- on top of my bruised ego (dont cry for me boston!), my bruised body, i will still churn out a weekly entry.
when substance is lacking- distract away w/pretty things.
w/that said- i am adding a picture for you to admire.
why you so hot boy?
i think im one of those odd people that have very conflicting personalities. im sure everyone thinks they are 'special' like that... that no one understands them but really- i think im all over the place.
maybe that's my claim to fame- my ability to be mediocore at every personality trait. im not particularly quiet, nor am i particularly not quiet.
my moods are like pendulums- they swing either way. or should i say my moods are like bisexuals- they swing either way. har har. (minimum of 1 corny joke to be slipped in entry- MET)
different people describe me differently. im not consistently one way w/any set group of friends. im just... all over the place.
when i was younger, i had wanted a signature 'personality'. something that defined me. something that i was known for. the only thing that i became known for was my 'ice stare down'. i could bitch stare you down faster than zoolander. (minimum of 1 corny joke to be slipped in entry- EXCEEDED)
my bitch stare down has since evolved into a subtle more sophiscated gentle lifting of the left eyebrow to denote superiority and disdain but that's beside the point. i guess im not a girlninja but not yet a woman ninja.
did i really utilize a britney spears circa 1990s reference? im on fi-yah today!
let me end this awkward entry as painlessly as possibly by adding more pretty things...
.
.
.
.
.
i apologize dear reader, girlninja has been one bad ninja.
and what excuses will i be pulling out from my bag of tricks? welllllll....
coakley lost the senate seat to brown. i mean hello- im a dem in bah-ston! my entire family including my 74 year old chinese father trekked out in the icy weather to vote for coakley. we dems are a proud bunch.
yeah... i believed that just about as much as you did.
i did just come back from a 3 day weekender snowboarding at sunday river where i had a fabulously lovely time. however i developed the following malaises:
1. slightly sprained right thumb
2. a fucked right big toe. i don't know exactly what's wrong with it but that shit is hurting and there were fleeting moments when i wondered if i would have to get that sucker amputated.
3. bruises
4. BED FUCKING BUGS. AGAIN! MOTHERFUCKERRRRR ME.
so yes- on top of my bruised ego (dont cry for me boston!), my bruised body, i will still churn out a weekly entry.
when substance is lacking- distract away w/pretty things.
w/that said- i am adding a picture for you to admire.
why you so hot boy?
i think im one of those odd people that have very conflicting personalities. im sure everyone thinks they are 'special' like that... that no one understands them but really- i think im all over the place.
maybe that's my claim to fame- my ability to be mediocore at every personality trait. im not particularly quiet, nor am i particularly not quiet.
my moods are like pendulums- they swing either way. or should i say my moods are like bisexuals- they swing either way. har har. (minimum of 1 corny joke to be slipped in entry- MET)
different people describe me differently. im not consistently one way w/any set group of friends. im just... all over the place.
when i was younger, i had wanted a signature 'personality'. something that defined me. something that i was known for. the only thing that i became known for was my 'ice stare down'. i could bitch stare you down faster than zoolander. (minimum of 1 corny joke to be slipped in entry- EXCEEDED)
my bitch stare down has since evolved into a subtle more sophiscated gentle lifting of the left eyebrow to denote superiority and disdain but that's beside the point. i guess im not a girlninja but not yet a woman ninja.
did i really utilize a britney spears circa 1990s reference? im on fi-yah today!
let me end this awkward entry as painlessly as possibly by adding more pretty things...
.
.
.
.
.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
9-5
name: girlninja
occupation: daydreamer
60% of the time, my head is in the clouds. i have this little fantasy i like to entertain. there are different variations of it but there is always 1 singular theme.
let's say it involves hot men.
and me.
and can get a bit x-rated.
kidding.
not.
sort of.
the x-rated parts are only subplots- but really, the main main storyline is as pure and chaste as my dick is big (if i was a guy that is).
whenever i get into one of my moods- it takes a lot for me to plummet down back to reality. usually- something spectacularly amusing must occur in my actual life to pique my interest.
once my trance is gone- it's gone. i can't force my mind to transport back even if i wanted to. im squarely back and center, focused on planet earth.
it's a sigh of relief (no one wants to end up being the fat kid watching anime while eating butter alone at night and married to an avatar. and i dont mean the james cameron avatar).
but it's also bittersweet.
it's like saying goodbye to your childhood.
there's a certain seed of sad wistfulness that sprouts these leafs of fantasy.
i still have a certain naivety, and by naivety i think i mean carefree irresponsibility, that i have one foot planted firmly in reality and one foot planted in my own little lalaland.
so keep on dreaming playa*...
*author's footnote:
i realize i like to throw in a lot of hip hop vernicular up on this joint. im not quite sure why as my day to day jargon is pretty proper and posh. im not valley, im not street. most of the time i speak like im a therapist psychoanalyzing something and i look like the most benign sweetest little girl you've ever seen.
i dont know what the reason is but somehow it just feels right...
maybe my alter ego is a chola?
tag: girlninja
occupation: choke'abitch ninja
occupation: daydreamer
60% of the time, my head is in the clouds. i have this little fantasy i like to entertain. there are different variations of it but there is always 1 singular theme.
let's say it involves hot men.
and me.
and can get a bit x-rated.
kidding.
not.
sort of.
the x-rated parts are only subplots- but really, the main main storyline is as pure and chaste as my dick is big (if i was a guy that is).
whenever i get into one of my moods- it takes a lot for me to plummet down back to reality. usually- something spectacularly amusing must occur in my actual life to pique my interest.
once my trance is gone- it's gone. i can't force my mind to transport back even if i wanted to. im squarely back and center, focused on planet earth.
it's a sigh of relief (no one wants to end up being the fat kid watching anime while eating butter alone at night and married to an avatar. and i dont mean the james cameron avatar).
but it's also bittersweet.
it's like saying goodbye to your childhood.
there's a certain seed of sad wistfulness that sprouts these leafs of fantasy.
i still have a certain naivety, and by naivety i think i mean carefree irresponsibility, that i have one foot planted firmly in reality and one foot planted in my own little lalaland.
so keep on dreaming playa*...
*author's footnote:
i realize i like to throw in a lot of hip hop vernicular up on this joint. im not quite sure why as my day to day jargon is pretty proper and posh. im not valley, im not street. most of the time i speak like im a therapist psychoanalyzing something and i look like the most benign sweetest little girl you've ever seen.
i dont know what the reason is but somehow it just feels right...
maybe my alter ego is a chola?
tag: girlninja
occupation: choke'abitch ninja
Monday, January 4, 2010
Goal #2
Those that are avid readers will know from my previous entry that Goal #1 was to get back my booty shaking hot teenage thang body. the gym was frequented today. success.
observation:
Going to the gym takes up all my time usually reserved for doing nothing. i mean really. wtf is that all about?
ill be the first person to say it: im lazy.
i like doing jackshit.
i like to park my ass in front of my computer and let my mind turn to mush as i surf.
really, it's like im barely conscious as my fingers clicketyclack away on the keyboard.
what do i do? i couldnt tell you even if i tried. my brain has no recollection.
a little of fb. a little of email. a bit of celebrity gossip. a bit of my usual plethora of favorite blogs. refresh. and repeat.
and before u know it- it's bedtime for me.
anyhow- i bring this up because this whole working out daily thing brings up a very good question. if one spends all their non working hours working out at gym... then when does one have time to go out and show off sexy body by wearing skintight spandex?? it's a vicious cycle! no one gets to appreciate the visuals of said slammin body.
if a tree falls in a forest and no one is around- does it make a sound??!!
if no one gets a chance to soak in the hotness of a well defined body- is said body really well defined??!!
this is just too deep for me. im not sure if my mind can process this much right now. dear reader, i will leave this for you to ponder.
as for me, i will go along to my main entry point, my Goal #2.
Goal #2.
I will attempt to update weekly. naturally- expect stupidity and vapidness to ensue. and lotsa of it. (reference previous potty humor entry as a evidence).
that is all.
good day and good night to all.
observation:
Going to the gym takes up all my time usually reserved for doing nothing. i mean really. wtf is that all about?
ill be the first person to say it: im lazy.
i like doing jackshit.
i like to park my ass in front of my computer and let my mind turn to mush as i surf.
really, it's like im barely conscious as my fingers clicketyclack away on the keyboard.
what do i do? i couldnt tell you even if i tried. my brain has no recollection.
a little of fb. a little of email. a bit of celebrity gossip. a bit of my usual plethora of favorite blogs. refresh. and repeat.
and before u know it- it's bedtime for me.
anyhow- i bring this up because this whole working out daily thing brings up a very good question. if one spends all their non working hours working out at gym... then when does one have time to go out and show off sexy body by wearing skintight spandex?? it's a vicious cycle! no one gets to appreciate the visuals of said slammin body.
if a tree falls in a forest and no one is around- does it make a sound??!!
if no one gets a chance to soak in the hotness of a well defined body- is said body really well defined??!!
this is just too deep for me. im not sure if my mind can process this much right now. dear reader, i will leave this for you to ponder.
as for me, i will go along to my main entry point, my Goal #2.
Goal #2.
I will attempt to update weekly. naturally- expect stupidity and vapidness to ensue. and lotsa of it. (reference previous potty humor entry as a evidence).
that is all.
good day and good night to all.
2010 starts off with an explosion
what kinda explosion? the dirty kind. and i dont mean dirrty (oh xtina). but dirty.
in the past few months- i think the season spirit got the best of me. i went a bit overboard with the drinking... the partying... the eating... the drinking.. the women... and the men... oh and the shoes. my collection is growing by leaps and bounds!
my faveee #1 prized booty thus far: a pair of 5 inch swedish hooker shoes gone clog. me loves it.
even though dear friends have described it as "ugly clogs" and/or "gross clogs".
what can i say- i love things that are tres polarizing. when you vehemently despise or adore something- it speaks so much of the item. u know it ain't some bland GAP, BR, Jcrew shot out the ass loafers. it's different and that's why it causes such a strong reaction. and for me- my reaction was the instant adoration kind- the 'momma and her newly birthed child' kind of connection.
anyhow- the past few months got the best of me and i found myself growing a buddha belly. the maternity chic hasn't been that popular w/the boys. so i vowed to go back to the gym come 2010.
and what better way to kick off my 2010 diet/detox than catching a stomach bug! oh yes. for the past few days ive been squirting out everything ive eaten.
what a great jumpoff for my diet. im already 3lbs lighter.
it's like nature's bulimia... but for your bum.
how lovely for me.
well im signing off now. gotta go shit.
in the past few months- i think the season spirit got the best of me. i went a bit overboard with the drinking... the partying... the eating... the drinking.. the women... and the men... oh and the shoes. my collection is growing by leaps and bounds!
my faveee #1 prized booty thus far: a pair of 5 inch swedish hooker shoes gone clog. me loves it.
even though dear friends have described it as "ugly clogs" and/or "gross clogs".
what can i say- i love things that are tres polarizing. when you vehemently despise or adore something- it speaks so much of the item. u know it ain't some bland GAP, BR, Jcrew shot out the ass loafers. it's different and that's why it causes such a strong reaction. and for me- my reaction was the instant adoration kind- the 'momma and her newly birthed child' kind of connection.
anyhow- the past few months got the best of me and i found myself growing a buddha belly. the maternity chic hasn't been that popular w/the boys. so i vowed to go back to the gym come 2010.
and what better way to kick off my 2010 diet/detox than catching a stomach bug! oh yes. for the past few days ive been squirting out everything ive eaten.
what a great jumpoff for my diet. im already 3lbs lighter.
it's like nature's bulimia... but for your bum.
how lovely for me.
well im signing off now. gotta go shit.
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